« Friday the 13th XIII -- Carmen Gets Zapped | Main | Baby Daddy »
June 14, 2008
Hero-ick
Somewhere, in an unidentified state in the Southwest, there is a town known as Prickly City. Threatened by the eeevil LIBERAL AGENDA, it is defended by its heroes...
NEO-CON CARMEN!
Watch...as she talks out of both sides of her mouth at the same time!
Marvel...as she uses her powers of hypocrisy to act superior to everyone else!
Be astounded...as the part in her hair spreads wider and wider, horrifying her enemies!
And of course there's her trusty sidekick...
WINSTON!
Stare...as he talks like a conservative tool even though he claims to be a talking liberal coyote!
Witness...his incredible ability to always be the one to blame, even when conservatives are at fault!
Be astonished...by his ability to crash into the ground repeatedly because a certain someone thinks it's funny to have him try to fly over and over and over again, even though the joke hasn't been funny ever!
Separate, they are simply annoying. Together, they are...
THE UNFUNNY RE-PUBLICANS!
Under the guidance of their confused, irritable leader ST. JOHN MCCAIN, and taking their marching orders from KARL "TURD BLOSSOM" ROVE, the Unfunny Re-Publicans do everything in their power to convince Americans that everything bad is the Democrats' fault and Republicans only want to cut taxes and kill terrorists and are teh awesome. With the help of newspaper editors across the country, these defenders of THE REAGAN LEGACY will lie, cheat, and steal in the name of ABE LINCOLN (their patron saint, even though he wasn't a conservative like they claim) to keep America safe from the unwashed masses (in other words, poor people).
So sit back and hold tight, dear reader. As America's future hangs in the balance, and a new threat arises in the form of BARRY MOHAMMAD HUSSEIN OSAMA, can Neo-Con Carmen and her sidekick Winston keep America safe from the threat of true democracy and make sure Republicans continue to control the government and the media? Stay tuned!
But first, a few words from their sponsors...big oil, lobbyists, and the Religious Right. And if you change the channel, you're a terrorist who hates America!
Comments
We know Carmen doesn't live in California, because the California desert is humid (thank you, Salton Sea), so Winslow could not have zapped her with static electricity there.
So this leaves Arizona, New Mexico, and Nevada. IIRC, Arizona and New Mexico have some Latino Republicans, so a conservative "of color" would not be strange in those places, any more than they would be strange in places like, oh, I don't know, the Supreme Court? The Bush Cabinet?
So that leaves us with Nevada.
Also, it shows that Scotty is clueless enough that he doesn't even know his own party. Sheesh.
Posted by: Annie at June 14, 2008 02:42 PM
