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December 30, 2006
Right Said Scott
It's interesting watching the machinations of the mind of the typical Republican/Conservative/Bush Republican/Rightie in the wake of the November elections. Scott Stantis has been using his surgically-repaired right arm as a metaphor for their comeback, and it's pretty fascinating.
Today Carmen compares the Right's return like the phoenix rising from the ashes. She'll retrain the right to cut government spending, get rid of the pork, and stop being so gosh-darned corrupt. Winslow has a nice line about them just waiting for another Reagan and Carmen has a lame comeback about eating him. Hey, one outta two ain't bad, and it's downright amazing for Stantis.
What I love so much about this after-election regret on the part of the Righties is that these are the same folks that blindly supported Bush for the past six years without question. Sure Stantis mumbled about spending too much every once in a while, but did that stop him from fully endorsing Bush and his cronies? I didn't see him offering up any alternatives as the election approached.
There's been a bizarre transformation in the Republican party over the last six months or so, and I think guys like Stantis are just starting to accept it. Here's a brief summary of the Republican party:
- Large government, primarily under the guise of "Homeland Security"
- Huge spending, mainly to pay for tax cuts for the wealthy and tax breaks for corporations (not to mention a war based on lies)
- Pre-emptive invasion of countries based on political and financial ambition, not actual threats
- Allow lobbyists to write legislation
- Allow corporations to dictate policy
- Privatize everything
- Science schmience
- "Either you're with us or against us"
- Diplomacy schmiplomacy
You get the idea. I'm sure everyone could add a few more to the list. But that's where I've seen the Republican party drift under Bush. Some Republicans have held back, but the majority in power - and most of their supporters - have been along for the ride and more than happy to act as their cheerleaders. Like Scott Stantis.
I suppose I could sympathize more with Stantis if he had been complaining about these things all along. Other than a few lines about "spending like a drunken sailor" (which he would only do while also referencing Democrats), he didn't complain about oil companies getting tax breaks and writing the energy policy, or big pharma writing the Medicaid legislation, or Bob Ney and Tom Delay redefining political corruption. Heck, Stantis even endorsed Mark Foley because the Democrats are supposedly so eeeevil. Nothing says "family values" like "vote for the guy who stalks teenage boys."
So let's see if Scott Stantis can rehab the Righties. Maybe they can come up with a new name for their party for starters. Maybe they can be the "As The Wind Blows Party" since Stantis's political position shifts with whatever makes him looks best. I for one would be consider voting for a party that promised the following:
- No corruption
- Less government spending on things like bridges to nowhere and moving trains so they can build more gulf-front condos
- Less government spending on tax cuts for people who don't need them (oh, wait, you mean Stantis doesn't oppose that kind of government spending?)
I'm curious as to where Stantis's party stands on things like personal privacy. Does he still endorse illegally spying on Americans? How about invading other countries that aren't a threat to us? Will he still want to tell us who we can marry? Maybe they can be the neo-Republican party - less government interference in our lives, unless it's to tell us what our morals should be. Because they're the party of morality, dontcha know. Well, "Christian" morality, as taught by Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell and George W. Two Terms Mandate Bush.
Good luck with "rehabbing the right," Mr. Stantis. I do think it's possible. Heck, with the unfortunate passing of President Ford we've learned that he was America's greatest hero because he pardoned his friend Nixon for all of the crimes he committed (and tells us that he was Nixon's ONLY friend - but there was no quid pro quo). If Ford can go from being the worst president of the last 30 years to the best, I suppose anything can happen for the Republican party.
Comments
Thought I mention that there's FINALLY a new podcast.
He mostly gives shout-out to the guest-artists, talks about the URL change from ucomics to gocomics that messed up the RSS code, and stuff like that.
(oh, and how do you pronounce "Lio" cartoonist Mark Tatulli's name? I imagined that it's pronounced TATTOO-LI)
Posted by: Charles Brubaker at December 30, 2006 10:07 AM
