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November 11, 2006
And They're Not Actually Made of Butter Either
First of all, I'd like to thank everyone who voted on Tuesday. Despite Sacki's lack of understanding of the democratic process, people came out in droves to have their voices heard, and what they basically said was "throw the bums out." Now we have to make sure the people we put into office aren't as corrupt and incompetent as the last bunch. Fortunately, those guys set the bar pretty high for being the Worst Congress Ever. Now we just have to deal with the Worst President Ever, and as he showed at the end of the week he's not going to be as bipartisan as he says he is (especially saying he wants to push through John Bolton and his illegal wiretapping with this lame duck Congress).
In Prickly City, Winslow is trying to transform himself into a butterfly, but he's not having much luck making his cocoon. Hey, I have an idea why it might not be going so well: butterflies don't make cocoons, moths do. In their pupa stage a butterfly will make a chrysalis, not spin a cocoon. What, do newspapers simply not have proofreading sections anymore? I guess it doesn't matter to Stantis - he's a "from the gut" kinda guy, just like Stephen Colbert and George W. Bush. He doesn't have any need for "facts." In his Red State of Mind, butterflies make cocoons because it makes for a better "joke," and gosh darnit that's how it's gonna be.
It must be an interesting time around the Stantis household. The Republicans lost both houses of Congress, sending the message loud and clear that the people are sick of the corruption, sick of Bush's "stay the course" in Iraq, tax breaks for oil companies while they post record profits, outrageous healthcare costs, a powermad President, and host of other things that this Congress ramrodded through WITHOUT the Democrats having any kind of say.
But, this gives Stantis the chance to make fun of the Dems since they finally wield a little power. He's already established that he LOVES to make fun of the appearance of a 66-year-old woman, and Nancy Pelosi is a virtual lock for the Speaker of the House (and lord knows Stantis couldn't figure out a way to make fun of the old Speaker Dennis Hastert. That was a guy custom-made for Stantis's "every politician I draw is a fat slob" abilities, yet he never made an appearance). Now I'm sure Prickly City will get visits from those Radical Extremist Smelly Stinky Stupid Liberals like Charlie Rangel and John Conyers and Henry Waxman - Democrats who have this silly notion of something called "checks and balances." Bastards. How dare they even attempt to question The Leader? Oh, there will be hell to pay when both Carmen and Winslow go after their extremist policies like smaller government, no tax breaks for the oil companies, and funding stem cell research. And yes, it will be both Carmen and Winslow - didn't you catch "liberal" Winslow slamming Sean Penn yesterday? The days of Winslow being a Democrat are over.
There's something else though that should worry Stantis: the conservative media might not feel the need to carry a conservative strip like Prickly City anymore. The previous quota policy might be thrown out the door, since the American people have shown that there's a MAJORITY of them who aren't radical conservatives like Stantis, so Prickly City might go the way of the dodo bird. That, or we'll get a moderate strip instead that actually IS fair and balanced. We shall see, but I'm betting that when Stantis takes a few weeks off in December (thanks for the heads up, CB) he'll be terrified their won't be a job waiting for him when he heals up.
So since I last posted on Tuesday we now have a Democratic House and a Democratic Senate, but Scott Stantis is still making stupid mistakes like saying butterflies make cocoons. The more things change, the more they stay the same.
