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October 29, 2006
Worst Comic Strip In The World
Ladies and gentleman, I present to you today what could very well be the worst Prickly City ever. And that's REALLY saying something.
The set-up is simple: Carmen and Winslow encounter each other while trick or treating. They see each other's horrible masks (politically-related, of course) and run away screaming.
Pretty easy huh? Not for Scott Stantis.
Panel 1: Winslow and Carmen walk towards each other with a giant banana hanging in the sky.
Can someone please teach him how to draw a moon? Come on!
Panel 2: Carmen points at Winslow and yells, "Nancy Pelosi!" Winslow looks at Carmen and screams, "Shannen Doherty!"
What the F*CK??? Where do I start? First off, Stantis continues his bizarre practice of having a Democrat dress up like his hero (last year Winslow was Al Franken, Ted Kennedy, and Michael Moore). At first you think, "Oh, cuz he wants to scare Republicans." But as I pointed out last year, that's like Scott Stantis donning a Dick Cheney or George W. Bush or John McCain mask - would a Dem really want to insult one of his own by making fun of their appearance? It would be a whole lot more fun (and make a whole lot more sense) for me to dress up on Halloween as Donald Rumsfeld instead of Harry Reid.
On top of that, Stantis insists on making Winslow wear a Nancy Pelosi mask, continuing the proud Prickly City tradition of making fun of an elderly woman's looks. Bravo, Mr. Stantis. It takes real BALLS for you to stand up and make such a brave criticism. While you're at it, why don't you make a claim that Michael J. Fox is probably faking having Parkinson's - you'll fit right in with the rest of the Republican blowhards who would rather throw around personal insults than actually discuss the issues using facts.
Maybe I wouldn't be so hard on Stantis if Carmen was wearing a political mask. But Poor Scott Stantis is sooooo afraid of alienating his Republican base that he has her wearing a...Shannen Doherty mask??? Again I ask, what the f*ck? When was the last time she was relevant? Yeah I know she has some show on TV now about breaking up couples, but does anyone watch it? And what does she have to do with politics? It's not like she's a well known celebrity Republican - I could *maybe* understand Winslow being scared by a Charlton Heston or Ah-nold mask - and I don't even have a clue who Doherty is supporting this November 7th. And I doubt Stantis does either. He was just flipping stations one night, saw that she was acting like a bitch on her show, and decided it would be much safer to use her instead of the logical choice of a Republican.
The reality is this was an easy gag for Stantis: if he was going to scare Carmen with Pelosi, she should scare Winslow wearing a Dennis Hastert mask. But no - lord knows he can't offend the Bush Republicans like himself. At least he didn't make another offensive Mark Foley joke.
Panel 3: And finally the cherry on top: Carmen and Winslow run away from each other screaming, and I quote: "AWWWWWWWWWA." No exclamation points needed.
As CJo and I have pointed out numerous times: who the hell yells "aww" or "awa" when they're frightened? The preferred term is "AHHHHHH!" And no, it's not "AHHHHA!" - that would be read as "gotcha" or "I understand." But nobody is going to convince Stantis that "awwwa" somehow stands for terror. What an idiot.
The only thing that might keep this from being the worst ever is that Stantis actually planned ahead and realized Halloween was on Tuesday. Usually this would be a joke we'd see on Thanksgiving.
So there you have it: today's nominee for Worst Comic Strip in the World (and yes, I'm paying tribute to Keith Olbermann - the only newsman outside of Jack Cafferty worth watching anymore). Granted tomorrow Stantis will probably top himself like he always does. I just wish if he was going to continue to suck so bad he'd find new and better ways to suck. Instead it's the same old, same old - poor drawings, non-sensical "jokes," dated references, and words nobody uses. In other words he's just like Bush Republicans who have nothing new to offer us in these elections, yet they'll probably keep their jobs. And that's really scary.
Comments
Wait... Don't Christians (considering the Republican=Christian equation) comdemn Halloween to being with?
Is he being a hypocrite once again?
Posted by: AtmanRyu at October 30, 2006 12:58 AM
