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September 23, 2006
As Grampa Simpson Would Say: Bitch, Bitch, Bitch
When I was a teenager in the mid-80s Sony came out with the Watchman, a handheld black and white television you could take anywhere. Now I loves me some TV - heck back in those days I could tell you what show was on what channel at what time. My family would take vacation down in Austin, Texas and we would drive down there. For the unfamiliar, that's a 22 hour drive. 22 hours of family chat is enough to make anybody go mad, so I begged and pleaded to get a Watchman so I'd have something to do. Mom said if I saved enough I could get one, but unfortunately the Watchman was pretty pricey. I ended up settling for another portable television that didn't even have a name brand on it and was roughly the size of a cinder block. But gosh dangit, I had my TV.
Now back then of course there was no such thing as cable or satellite TV, so I'd have to wait until we passed by a town big enough to have its own television station. And that would mean getting only a few minutes of watchable programming by the time I got the dial set to the right station and the image clear enough to make out what was going on. But man, were those few minutes sweet. I still have that "mini" TV in my closet. It's a piece of crap and I'd be lucky if I could pay a pawn shop to take it off my hands, but at the time it was the greatest invention in the world to a teenage kid hungry to watch a little TV when he wasn't supposed to be able to.
Prickly City brought back those memories this morning. Stantis is once again bitching about technology, this time that we can watch TV anywhere we want, be it on our cell phones or when we're pumping gas. So what? Is that a bad thing? Ever since we figured out how to broadcast Uncle Milty people have loved television. We've gone from a single black and white in the living room to TVs in every room to having TVs in our phones. But why is that bad? It allows us to watch the news, be entertained, and not have to sit there looking like dolts on the train while we wait for the next stop.
I guess I'm just not a bitter old man like Stantis. I wonder if he sits out on his lawn in his rocking chair with a shotgun in his lap yelling at those young whippersnappers to stay off his property. I mean yeah, the idea of a guy watching TV in a port-a-potty is silly, and toliet humor can elicit a giggle (and that's what it is - don't fool yourself - if he's not taking a crap, and is sitting in church, it's not the same kind of humor). But for pete's sake, you've got enough going on in the world of politics that we don't need to hear you bitching about how the world is passing you by. What, would you rather we live in caves? I thought you were scared to death of those guys and their boxcutters.
And was this a follow-up to yesterday's "Are they still watching?" strip? What was he talking about there? The government spying on us? Reality TV? Once again, Stantis scribbles down an idea and we're supposed to figure it out for him.
Maybe it's for the best having Stantis whine about TV instead of tackling real issues, like President Bush admitting we have secret prisons and have been holding accused terrorists without charges for years. Oh, and we're TORTURING THEM. And luckily enough the "Rebel Republicans," who are nothing of the sort, have just given Bush the power to continue torturing them. Add in that he's already illegally spying on us, lies us into war, and is planning on invading yet another country based on lies, and I'm starting to think that this is how the Germans must have felt in the 1930s.
And even if they did have television back then it wouldn't have mattered, since the media would have done what Mighty Leader told them to do. I guess the more things change, the more they stay the same.
PS - What's the deal with Carmen on the mountain top? Is she supposed to be Moses or something? Weird. I'm telling you, she should just buy a soap box for these little speeches.
