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June 16, 2006
None to Grow On
Today's strip makes as much sense as a diabetic Ella Fitzgerald reference. But let's try to decipher it anyway...
Being "Carbon Neutral" via "carbon offsets" is the concept of offsetting your carbon dioxide emissions via enviro-friendly activities. Spray underarm deodorant? Hug a tree. Drive an SUV? PLANT a tree. Charter an airplane? HUMP a tree. Or you can purchase "offsets" from agencies that will do the hugging/planting/humping on your behalf. Or something like that.
Seems like a noble enterprise, if you ask me. Take a little bit. Give a little bit. Give and take. Push and pull. Yin and yang. Yank and tug. Slap and tickle. Pound, pound, pound, release. It's all good.
But not According to Stantis. According to Stantis this practice "actually [adds] to the problem." Why? How? Huh? Wha?
Because, silly reader, it gives SMUG LIBERALS A FALSE SENSE OF SUPERIORITY. And THAT'S how it adds to the problem, you dope. Don't you get it? Don't you? You don't? No matter. Because, man, what a punch line: "TALK ABOUT AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH!"
You see...he turned Gore's title on its head! And used it AGAINST him! Kablammozingerific! Bling Blang hammer with his hammer! Zingo Zango cutting with his saw!
But if we look beyond the Crackling Wit & Wisdumb of Scott Stantis for a minute, we realize that he doesn't address any of the concerns that Gore raises. Instead, he pokes fun at Gore's appearance; he ridicules his speaking style; and uses this all as an excuse to rib liberals.
Meanwhile, all across America, factories belch filth into the sky; our streams and ponds are dumping grounds for waste; and teens -- who no doubt earlier in the day sprayed on underarm deodorant -- will throw half-eaten fast food out their car windows onto the feet of an extra-tanned Italian man who is dressed up in Native American garb. And a tear will slowly trickle down his cheek...
...And our own cheeks will blush with shame.
Comments
First of all, why is Winslow needling Gore too?
Secondly, Stantis must have missed the part where Gore explained that in his efforts to go around the world and help fight this problem, the best he can do is balance. And gee, if we ALL did that, then it wouldn't be the problem it is, would it Scooter? Maybe Stantis is the braintrust who wrote this:
"Global warming hasn't noticed that we got the lead out of our gasoline or that Stage One smog days in Los Angeles fell from 121 in 1977 to zero in 2004. All regulations and taxes to date have done nothing. Does this hint that pollution isn't the cause?"
Posted by: The Furnace at June 16, 2006 09:17 AM
A neat find in the commercial.
The indian in that PSA is Chief Iron Eyes Cody and while he's not an actual Native American (he was born to Sicilian immigrants) he claimes to be "part Cherokee".
He also appeared in movies such as "A Man Called Horse" and "Ernest Goes to Camp".
As for this strip, I actually wrote a letter to Stantis about it because of the last panel which parodied that "Al Gore invented the internet" nonsense and decided to straighten it out once and for all.....
Posted by: Charles Brubaker at June 16, 2006 09:23 AM
