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June 07, 2006
Is it the Shoes? It's gotta be the Shoes
What an utter disappointment. He sets us all up for a Heathen Smackdown but then veers off into pussyfoot shoe territory. You just can't win, Scott. We hammer you when your strip is an inane lecture on the joys of conservatism and we ream you when you drop politics and try to be "funny." And in weeks like this, when you flirt with a Conservative Cause Celebre ("Is God allowed in Modern US society?"), and then don't deliver anything -- no stinging rebuke of Liberalism run amok, no "jokes" worth a chuckle [as if] -- you especially earn our scorn. What's the point, man? Fight with us, amuse us, or put away your markers. You've got to know when to scold 'em, know when to fold them, know when to whale away, and know when to shun.
Now get down on your knees, boy. And repeat after me. (And you'd better be contrite, or else!)
O my God,
I am heartily sorry for
having offended no one,
and I detest all my strips,
because I dread the loss of syndication money,
and the pains of joblessness;
but most of all because
they offend Thee, my God,
Who are all good and
deserving of all Carmen's love.
I firmly resolve,
with the help of Thy and Toby's grace,
to praise Conservatism,
to slam Liberals,
and to tease Michael Moore about his weight.
Amen.
Comments
Amen.
I remember a "Married...with Children" where Al spoke to God and God helped him create the perfect shoe (it had wings!). I only mention that because I prefer to remember actually funny things instead of the crap Stantis gives us.
Posted by: The Furnace at June 7, 2006 09:12 AM
Personally, if I talked to God, I would ask about his sex life.
But I doubt the syndicate would've allowed that, since they full of political correctness crap.
Speaking of Michael Moore, since some war vetern just sued him (TRUE!), he might make a return in 2 weeks or so. Man! He hasn't been in the strip since early 2005!
Posted by: Charles Brubaker at June 7, 2006 09:15 AM
