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April 23, 2006
I'd Rather Be a Pepper
It's Sunday morning, so that means my head hurts after reading Prickly City. Stantis picks a stupid moment in history and tries to make a joke about it, and fails miserably. Seriously, New Coke? Here's a guy who's always two weeks behind on his political commentary, and the one time he gets a date in history right it's to make fun of a soft drink that people never cared about? Why not just make fun of a failed cola like OK ? Oh wait, I know why - nobody cares. Heck, he picks the 21st anniversay? Yeah, I know, that's probably part of the joke, but to me it reeks of a guy who didn't know what to do on a Sunday two weeks ago and he pulled up one of those "this day in history" websites and the strip wrote itself. Not so easy when you're not following the latest Republican talking points.
Well if Stantis is going way back, let's put on our own Shrubville Future Goggles and see what we might be in store for this week in Prickly City (other than the mayoral race that Stantis first teased months ago):
- All of a sudden Iran has nukes and has them pointed at Prickly City. Wow, some people - like most Republicans - never learn, do they? Honestly - a year ago if you told people "The administration will use the EXACT same build up that they used to go to war in Iraq to attack Iran" you'd laugh at them and say "Come on, we're not THAT gullible." Ahem. Maybe Winslow can spend the week making a bomb shelter and pretending we're back in those wonderful 1950s where kids were taught that hiding under your desk could protect you from a nuclear explosion.
- In a related note, Seymour Hersh's story broke about Bush planning to use his own nukes to attack Iran. Maybe all week long Stantis will have Carmen pounding her own war drum.
- In a little seen event (which means it's right up Stantis's alley), Ben Affleck said that if Bush did leak classified information then he committed treason and that he could be hung for that. Maybe Carmen will think Ben's dreamy, but since he's a terrorist he should be put in G'itmo with the full library of his movies and beaten with his own Oscar.
- More and more former Generals stepped forward and asked for Rumsfeld to resign. Two weeks later, George W. Bush told us he was The Decider, America's newest superhero.
- Bush himself admitted to leaking classified information in order to bolster his case to go to war in Iraq even though we now know he was ignoring all of the classified information that told him Iraq didn't have WMDs. This leads to the whole Good Leak/Bad Leak debate, which is defined as the White House thusly: a good leak is anything that makes us look good, and a bad leak is anything that makes us look bad. Maybe Winslow can leak to the local newspaper some nasty information about Carmen in their mayoral campaign that isn't true - and yes, I know Carmen should be the one doing that since she's a little Bushee, but we're talking Stantis here and anything bad Winslow does it.
- And finally, my favorite poll from that week, courtesy MSNBC: should Bush be impeached?
So a few weeks ago things really started to fall apart for W. Which is the perfect time for Stantis to finally follow through on his threats to have Carmen and Winslow run for the mayor's office. Maybe we can be introduced to the current mayor, who I'm sure will be drawn as a fat ugly drunk. Possibly wearing a diaper.
Comments
Bush has his own nukes?!
Posted by: j kendall at April 23, 2006 08:42 PM
